Poker Player Bill of Rights

From superusers to colluders, from shady sites to greedy governments, poker players are constantly at risk of being cheated, swindled, and defrauded. While intelligent players look out for themselves and each other, not everyone has access to enough information to keep safe. There should be an organization keeping an eye on these things, allowing players to focus on playing.

Before an organization can fight for our rights, we first must establish what those rights are. To this end, I have drafted a Poker Player Bill of Rights. I have defined and explained each right below, and followed that with an assessment of where we currently stand on protecting these rights.

For the complete Poker Player Bill of Rights, visit pokerfuse.com.

Patriotism Is A Character Flaw

“USA! USA! USA!” the crowds chanted outside the White House. “USA! USA! USA!” the crowds chanted at the ballpark. What few of these people realize is that this feeling they have coursing through their veins as they shout their brains out - that’s the feeling that inspired the murder of everyone in the World Trade Center. That feeling is the cancer that has had the human race destroying itself for all of recorded history. It’s us against them. They call it patriotism. I call it disgusting.

I wrote a piece about my views on patriotism. Read the rest here: http://www.freeassn.com/drupal/node/39

Happy 420

I don't smoke pot. I never have. That's not to say I'm opposed. It's just not my thing.

The fact that the majority of my friends and previous girlfriends were potheads meant that every day at 4:20 there would be giggles and high fives and the refrain of "let's go smoke a bowl." I would roll my eyes, not because the smoking bothered me (it didn't), but because having some official time, like it was a holiday to get excited about - well, it just struck me as arbitrary and annoying, like somehow that was more their time than it was my time.

But I get it now. For almost a hundred years, marijuana has been criminalized and scandalized. And for what? Alcohol is a harsher drug, but that's legal. Cigarettes can kill people who don't even smoke them, but they're allowed. I've always been in favor of legalization. I even sponsored a bill in mock congress when I was 14. (When it lost 6-6-1, I literally fell backwards out of my chair in frustration. Ironically, the one dude who abstained from the vote didn't abstain from drugs. But I digress.)

What I understand now, on 4/20, is that when you're a group that's been fighting for your rights for the better part of a century, it helps to have a rallying cry. A rallying time. A rallying place.

It may be 4/20 today, but now is the time for poker players to rally as well. Now is the time and this is the place: Free Association

More Fun ThanChucking Blueberries

Last night I played bass with a "band" for the first time since May of 2002. Outside of playing on a few recordings with my old band (for which I played guitar and never found a suitable bassist), I'd hardly touched the thing in seven years. It turns out that I'm still somewhat capable. Playing with two superb musicians certainly helped. It was also the first time I had played with my good friend Max since that last L.A. show in 2002.

The studio had the appearance of a run down wreck. A sign posted on peeling drywall spoke of renovations to bring the place from "your last resort to your first choice". No matter - the gear was actually quite good for a rehearsal studio. At one point Max was extolling the virtues of my Les Paul (he didn't have a guitar in NYC, so I brought mine), prompting Alan to ask, "Are you mad at it?" 

Anyway, Alan had not even heard the songs before. So Max took out his little internet/phone gadget and played the songs streaming live from his website. Pretty high tech. But the phone isn't too loud, so he held it up to a microphone and played it over the PA. Pretty low tech.

So what were we playing? Max has a new project, Max and the Marginalized where he writes a topical song every week and posts it up as a political blog entry on The Huffington Post. It's more of a band now, since he has two other guys in California that he plays and tours with. The songs have Max's typical tight arrangements and sharp lyrics along with his signature style of guitar abuse. We worked on three of those: Rope (a semi-straight up hardcore tune about the glorification of lynchings in the South), Free Evenings and Weekends (a jaunty tune about the complicity of phone companies in illegal wiretapping practices), and Hounds (I had never tried playing reggae before, but I can see why people like it).

So what were Alan and I doing there? We're sort of the East Coast ringers. If there's some shows over here and not a full tour for the West Coast band to come on, maybe we'll play those. It feels good to be playing music again, especially on great songs that have something to say. But more than anything it was a hell of a lot of fun.

Ending Prohibition

So it turns out that poker players are, in fact, lazier than pot heads. I wrote the following in my poker blog last week: 

"President-elect Obama is giving the American people an unprecedented opportunity to give input to our new government. His transition team website: change.gov has a special section where citizens can post issues of concern for anyone to vote on. As per the site: "The best rated ideas will rise to the top -- and be gathered into a Citizen's Briefing Book to be delivered to President Obama after he is sworn in." 

To tell the President to explicitly legalize online poker, all you have to do is click this link: 

http://citizensbriefingbook.change.gov/ideas/viewIdea.apexp?id=087800000004m5M&srPos=0&srKp=087 

Vote Up, fill out the quick form, and leave a comment if you wish. That's all. You can even do it while you're playing 8 tables."

Similar messages were plastered across poker websites for the past week. After a strong start, the well worded suggestion to "Boost America's Economy with Legal Online Poker" finished in eleventh place. It had a net positive count of under 5,000 votes, about half of what first place "Ending Marijuana Prohibition" received. Now, it's possible that marijuana has a broader audience than online poker. But I choose to think that poker players are simply lazier than pot heads (not that the two are mutually exclusive).

Don't get me wrong. I've never smoked pot in my life, but I support ending marijuana prohibition. The government should not be telling us what to do in our own homes. Further, the hypocrisy of allowing alcohol and cigarettes but not pot mirrors the absurdity of allowing poker in casinos and on TV but not online.

So to marijuana law reformists, I'll say "good game" and best of luck. To all of my friends who took the time to vote I send a hearty thanks. Together we can make a difference. This wasn't the first time the incoming administration asked for input, and it won't be the last. So keep your eyes and ears open. I'll be here waving my arms and making all the noise I can.

Note: This post has been edited to reflect the closing of the polls.